What does a loving husband look like? Someone who provides financially for his wife and family, cuts the grass regularly, maintains the house, plans good vacations and saves up for the future? It's a rhetorical question, really.
These are all good things but certainly not sufficient. Let's take a look at the greatest example of a loving 'husband.'
Ephesians 5:28 - Husband, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the Church, and gave Himself for it.
Husbands - That's the WHO. If you're a husband, reflect on what follows (see below). If you are a wife, send this to your husband or read it together =)
Love your wives - That's the WHAT. There's nothing more important as a husband. You may think you know how to love your wife but it's an area in which you should always be growing.
As Christ loved - That's the HOW. God has not left it up to us to know how to love our wife. He left us an example. There's no need for confusion, reinvention or worry. Christ paved the way!
Gave Himself - That's the MEASURE. There is no greater love. He gave His life for us!
Jesus showed us what courageous love looks like. He loved his bride, the Church, and give Himself for her. We, husbands, must do the same. Here are some of the disciplines and attitudes a husband must embrace to reflect the courageous love of Christ.
1. Do the will of God
In Hebrews 10:9 we read of Jesus, Here I am, I have come to do your will. Jesus did the will of God. Whose will are you doing? Think about it. Every day, we have the choice of following our way or the Master's way. Psalm 40:8 it says, I delight to do Your will, O my God, and Your law is within my heart. Part of doing the will of God is storing up the Word of God! The two are inseparable. If I am not delighting in doing the will of God, it's most likely because I'm not delighting in reading the Word of God.
2. Take time to be alone with God
Taking time to be alone from your wife or family, just for the sake of it, or to escape responsibilities, is absolutely selfish. But taking time to be alone with God is refreshing, empowering, and beneficial to you, your wife and your family. If you want to lead and love with courage, meet with God. Luke 5:16 - Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed. If Jesus withdrew often to be alone with God, I need to as well!
3. Point your wife to God
In Jesus' prayer, in John chapter 17, we read in verse six: I have revealed you to those whom you gave me out of the world. Want to be a courageous husband? Lead your wife to God. You can't reveal God to her, only the Holy Spirit can do that, but you can guide her, equip her, and encourage her. In verse 8 of the same chapter, we read, For I gave them the words you gave me and they accepted them.
4. Pray for her
Verse nine in John 17 says, I pray for them. Jesus prayed for his disciples. And Scriptures says He is at the right hand of the Father and he is still praying (see Rom.8:34). He prays for you and I! What an honor and blessing. As a husband, I can lead with courageous love by praying for my wife.
5. Protect her
John 17:11,12 - Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name, the name you gave me, so that they may be one as we are one. While I was with them, I protected them and kept them safe by that name you gave me. Husband, how can you protect your wife?
These are just a few ways I can lead and love my wife with courage, by following the example of Christ. These principles are great for a new husband nervous about his new role or for the men that want to be a husband someday. But they are also a timeless reminder for all the married men. And to all of you, I say...
Keep the fire burning,
Short, Biblical lessons and free resources on all things love & marriage. A pocket-guide for married couples and for single adults who want Gods best for their life.