Marriage Myth #2: He/She Is My Soulmate

[This is an excerpt and shortened version from the study series called 'Marriage: The Myth & The Meaning', shared with the young adults of our church earlier this year (2021)]
 
How it sounds: “There is one perfect person out there for me.”

Compatibility is not something you find, discover, test for, or stumble into. Compatibility is something you create over a lifetime of marriage. The biblical term for compatibility is “oneness.” Genesis 2:24 says, “they become one flesh.” You don’t find compatibility, you become compatible (Focus on the Family).
 
The idea that God designed a specific spouse for each person as a soulmate or perfect fit and apart from them you can never be happy is not Biblical. God does not have “the one” as your perfect spouse created from the beginning of time.

I didn't marry Daniela because she was my soulmate I married her because I love her and knew it was God's will for me to marry her. I had peace. Peace from God, not from a movie, novel or catchy love song. So much to unpack here but the order is vital. If you seek a soulmate you may end up with only that, a person who you label or think of as a soulmate, and around whom you can talk about your favorite shows, Insta-influencers, political videos, and even conspiracy theories (deep stuff). You might even get warm, fuzzy feelings, a fast heartbeat and sweaty palms...but they may have nothing to do with God. But if you seek God - sincerely, wholeheartedly - He will bless you with wisdom in choosing a spouse. A spouse who also loves God and seeks His kingdom and righteousness above all other things, including above marriage!

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