Unlike me, Jesus doesn't offer His bride quick solutions.
Don't talk, just listen.
That's an important lesson I've learned (and am still working on) during the nearly 14 years I've been married. You would think I'd have picked it up sooner seeing I have a perfect example in Jesus of what it looks like to listen.
Aren't you glad we have a Father who hears us? When I have a lot on my heart and want to talk to God, I know that He listens when I draw near to Him in prayer. I just know that He is there and I can talk to Him, whatever the state of my heart.
But what if He interrupted me after the first few seconds of talking to Him and started offering advice and solutions to the needs I bring before Him (I'm not saying it can never happen that way, He is Sovereign afterall)? Or, vice versa. What if He wants to talk to me and all I'm doing is rambling and concerned about my own agenda?
Do our prayers sometimes go wrong because we insist on trying to talk to God when He wants to talk to us?
(...and now, here's me speaking to myself...)
Tips for Listening to Your Wife (Not Just Hearing, Listening)
1. Make time - Of course, we should always be listening to our wife but when she has something more serious or important to share, make time for it. Put everything else aside.
2. Listen with your eyes - God made us so wonderfully that we can intake information (body language, visual cues, etc.) with our eyes not just with our ears. As she speaks, my wife needs to see me listening.
3. Focus & Wait - Think about what she is saying, don't try to come up with a response or answer. She's probably not even interested in that. Take a few seconds of silence after she is done talking to consider what she shared.
4. Follow-up - At a later time, the right time, follow-up on what she told you.
"The righteous cry out and the Lord hears them..." - Ps. 34:17
Dear Lord, thank You for my wife. Help me to love her as you have loved the church. Teach me to listen and understand her as we journey together in life.
with Danny & Daniela Kovacs
No family is an island. Join us as we share candid discussions, Biblical advice & resources to help keep God at the center of your faith, family and career.