Husbands: There's A Prerequisite To Intimacy

Just from reading the title of this post, you probably think I'm referring to sexual intimacy. I partially am. But that's not the only kind of intimacy in marriage.

​Intimacy of any kind in marriage - spiritual, physical, emotional, etc. - requires me to take some prequalifying steps.

If I flunked Calculus 1, there's no way I'm moving up to Calculus II.

Sure, there are times when it can be 'spontaneous' and very much unplanned but for the most part, in a healthy marriage, intimacy often looks like a lively, consistent pursuit. A back and forth of sorts. Two minds, hearts, even bodies, giving their best to unite, share and enjoy deep experiences (read the Song of Solomon for some non-Hollywood exchanges of real love and romance.)

As it relates to a healthy prayer life, the Word of God says two things need to happen: I need to live with my wife in an understanding way and show her honor.

If you don't know what these two things look like, ask your wife. Seriously, there’s no one better to ask (I folded a piece of paper up and made two columns for Daniela to fill out. That’s just a suggestion). The couples around you are a good source, books can help, podcasts offer support, even pastors can provide direction. But only your wife lives with you 24/7. She would know best. Knowing these two things, how to understand her and honor her, and acting on them is the prereq to answered prayer. God says so.

​Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not b hindered. - 1 Peter 3:7